Currently Listening Waiting for Your Letter By Cary Brothers Honestly see related

I’ve realized I tend to be anti-social under completely comfortable situations. Not really anti-social, but quiet. I observe more these days

…Last night I had an alarming dream.

It began with some local body of water being filled with files of torpedoes. I can’t really remember the rest, but it was a massively destructive situation. The torpedoes began to shoot off, one by one, row by row…

 It was very graphic, my dream. People were being blown to pieces and blood was everywhere. I’d never had a dream like this.

There was one occasion where I dreamt I was with people being chased by bombs. It was hippie-camper related…some mountain setting…and a bouquet of people desiring peace running from their poison, war…

I wonder why I had this specific dream last evening…I don’t even recall slipping into sleep…but I do recall my evening thoughts and their continuation into morning.

You see, I’ve come to realize something very important.

I’ve discovered my weakness, and the name belonging to it. My weakness is regret… and the name my greatest belongs to is the one I will continue to mask through my music.

I laugh.

How blind can a person with effortless vision be?

Completely.

The journey ahead of me presents a road of uncertainty… There’s not even a fork in the road, just one…vast…open plane. My surroundings are familiar, but undiscovered. Hope is written on the soles of my shoes and love is written all over me. With apology becoming the color of my eye.

I am aware.

And I am incredibly sorry.

Disregarding our nation’s current war and violence, I suppose my dream connects with my desire to just let go, to confess, and surrender my trivial battle…there are much bigger “things” in this world...and maybe....maybe I am hurting or...affecting people by not speaking...

I am.

tomorrow is a question in itself

I know this.

And yet…I won’t break my silence…in fear of facing my weakness…in fear of a forced introduction to a new regret or a bitter reunion with an old one.

I wish I was not blind, but I thank God for my current sight.

My sight...ironically bestowed on the 9th anniversary of my greatest decision that i disregarded due to my blindness.

My greatest regret.

this rose...settled in my hand with such an undefinable red...the beauty it possesed was far more enchanting then any face or color upon material goods...the red was so rich..it was my hope...i placed the rose upon my  nose and spun in the midst of a hallway...they callme a freebird...people judge and see different things...all i know it I see beauty in everything I see....and today was priceless as is everyday...

may you hold a rose in your hand when you feel lost...

follow the natural beauty...

and life will favor your smile...

greeting it several times in the day.....

love,

kaylyn marie.

Currently Listening Villains By Verve Pipe freshman see related

Life has gone in a completely different direction.

I was baptized at midnight January 1 2006 in the BWI airport by a splash of the scene called reality and within it was the grace of nature and life. I'm alive. I'm here. I'm found.

Everything is complete.

Theres never been days where I can honestly say ntohign went wrong.....lately there hasn't been. I've developed this  infatuation with smiling and making otheres smile. I just want the world to pray and see the beauty they actually have.

Now, I'm not saying lifes perfect...that nothign can go wrong. I know for a fact itsd not true but only if I let it be. I'm sure within these next ocuple of weeks I;lll get upset about somethign but I have too much behind me and infront of me that keeps me smiling.

you do too.

if I were to tell the world to imagine everyone being loved "too much"...I'd get 3 diffferent responses...

"That would give the world peace"...

"That will never happen...feeling to much just leads to pain"

...and the traditional

"Shut the hell up you fucking dreamer"....

I suppose the reason the world doesn't love too much is for those 2 responses eluding to doubts  the world refuses to transform into hope. But honestly think about it...not doubts...no pessimism...forget the clock to your left that bothers you when you are enjoying your moment, fuck that building youre held captive in for 8 hours a day, and imagine....

If everyone loved one another "too much" it wouldn't be "too much"

it was be "just enough"...ideal....peace

it would be peace...

imagine hugging the person who stole your ipod or some material you're addicted to...do you think theyd feel the green guilt? ... someone stole my dell dj and a few dollars out of my purse...if I knew the person I'd give them a hug...and why? I don't know...i suppose I love and trust too much...Someone said "Kaylyn..not putting a lock on your locker?!...you trust the world too much"....

"The only mistake you  made was Trusting too much"

mistake?

I beg to differ...I believe thats one of the only right things I've done...trust, shows I believe in this soil we step on... I have hope... I love...too much?

what I'm saying is...enemies, there's no use...if pain caused by one person..love them. and that pain will become strength... think about the real world...us kids forget that a lot.... there's people afraid to walk out of their home, breathe the air,...even wake up from sleeping...think about those photos you see on the TV next time you complain about being alone on a friday night...not having your make-up look right...or not getting that shirt or CD you wanted so badly...

We're use to that...ironicly we understand so little as we're given so much...Empathy...that's all Cobain wanted the world to have..understanding of everything...and looking at the beauty in the most chaotic scene you'll witness...He felt "too much".according to our corrupt society...you know...it's not bad

Nothing's bad as long as you continue to find the good...as hard as that is..as cliche as that sounds...it's always possible...the good is there

You know...

I dare you to go a day...without looking in the mirror...take off your mask...continue smiling...even when you fail a test...get a rumor spread about you...or spill something..trip u the stairs... ...i dare you to just forget it... forget it...and love...

please, love "too much".

it snowed 2 days ago and today was the first day i actually stepped in it. I had a snowball fight the day after it snowed, due to a clearing of the driveway but I hadn't stepped in the  snow.

Walking home along evergreen and the wind chapped my lips, my trustee funky skirt held no advantage as a barrier to the wind. I wish I had my music with me. Someone drove by, I wondered where they were going...probably out with some friends. An elderly lady said hello and my face was so frozen when i tried to smile, my face remained neutral. Some adults are..no you know what MOST adults are ignorant to the world. They see no beauty in nature...why is it, that NOW, most kids are venturing into wantign what they have...ok just kidding..not most kids but at least the people I know...They have passions, they seee beauty in a tree, they feel happy....adults loose their grasp on feeling almost. Why? because of their label. "I am and adult, and because I have been on this earth longer than you, you must follow my example...step 1"

i hate teachers sometimes. they don't see the outer world that is extended from their cramped sickening classroom filled with dollar store knicknacks and stereotypical apple pencil holders.... why labels....

be your fucking self.

I dont say that word alot...so i fucking mean it.